Yeah, eat them before you come in.

Or keep them in your car to consume during your lunch break.

EDIT: Do not eat edibles and then drive. Leave your car at work and Uber home in scenario B

Damn. One month, you find out you have cancer. Next month, you’re dead.

This isn’t “clear evidence” of what you’re claiming.

That’s like someone saying “I ate some fries yesterday” and concluding “That’s clear evidence you went to McDonalds”

Ah, great point!

Thought one: Did they bother to legislate how cash transactions will work without it?

Funnily enough, Canada has not had pennies for a while. (Uh, it’s funny because you’re on lemmy.ca)

In Canada, cash transactions round to the nearest nickel (so $1.03 becomes $1.05, and $1.02 becomes $1.00).

They actually did a follow-up episode about Al Gore being right, and everyone had to apologize to him!

I don’t know how often they admit that they were wrong, but I thought that was big of them

I’ve read that teachers are disproportionately likely to be millionaires!

Damn. I believe it used to be 80, but the pandemic (and everything else) must’ve shortened that.

84 is pretty much the average life expectancy for a man in the US, isn’t it? Or at least for wealthy men in the US.

But if you interpret all the jokes as “things he wants to do”? Probably pretty good odds

What else would it mean? That’s the kind of content the internet creates.

a centaur-woman pregnant with octoplets

You may have spent too much of your lifetime on the internet if you think that this should be common knowledge, haha

(I say that as someone who probably fits into that category)

So, I changed my daily driver to linux several months ago and my gf a few weeks ago.

…

So, I changed […] my gf a few weeks ago.

How’s the new girlfriend?

I look closely at labels and quantities, etc…but I also look at quality, made-in-my-country-ness, etc.

I don’t need anybody to buy my groceries. I might even politely decline because someone could use it more.

The other signs sound spot-on, though.

Colombian killed

Usually, sentences go noun-verb. So who did this Columbian kill?

Colombian killed in U.S.

Oh, a Columbian was killed. In the US, of all places! What happened?

Colombian killed in U.S. strike

Oh, weird. I wonder what kind of strike (maybe the government shutdown?) resulted in this Columbian getting killed.

Colombian killed in U.S. strike was on a fishing trip,

Oh, that doesn’t make sense that there’d be a strike in the same place as a fishing trip. Wait, was he not in the US at all?

Make Headlines Have Propositions/Articles Again! (or whatever grammatical components are necessary to make headlines easier to parse; less garden path-y)

Colombian WHO WAS killed in A U.S. [MILITARY?] strike was on a fishing trip, wife claims

But voting for Kamala would be bad for Palestine! Not voting was the only way to save Palestine! /s

God is doing lots of cruel acts, isn’t he?

On the contrary, I think the standard way that just about everybody who can read English *understands would be best.

I wish headlines (and journalists in general) wouldn’t be so afraid about repeating words and names.

My first question was “Which streamer?”, and now I’m thinking they probably just didn’t want to use the name “Spotify” twice.

I’ve been noticing this trend over the last few years. They also seem to be using pronouns less.

Gaming journalists will write about Mario and say something like…

“Super Mario Odyssey is the newest Mario game where the red-hatted plumber takes on Bowser! The Nintendo superstar has all kinds of new abilities, and the mushroom-chomping, goomba-stomping hero even has a new friend!”

It just makes things annoying to read, imo

Literally the motivation behind Grok.

“ChatGPT doesn’t lie in the way that puts us in a positive light. So I’ll make my own AI to do just that!”