

[Long rant]
My brother has two twin autistic boys.
I came back from the UK to Canada a few times in the past to see family and when I spent time with them … I came really close to getting them to talk back to me. My brother would always come home later and then say: “gooo gooo gaga”. I was like, “what the hell are you doing? I’m almost able to get them to repeat what I say”. He was like, “oh it’s fine, they’ll pick it up”
Years passed. I came back to move in with my brother and when the kids were 4, almost 5. Guess what? They’re not toilet trained and they have speech issues. They can say colours, numbers, and shapes and can sometimes repeat things but they have no concept of sentences and stuff. My mother’s helping them take care of the kids but she’s addicted to her phone and speaks mainly in Chinese and didn’t really understand the purpose of getting the kids to learn incrementally. Their actual mother and father just keep saying “they’ll pick it up”. My brother actually said: “oh, it’s okay, you know why I’m not worried. Grade 1 teachers can still change them”. Their mother was like: “they’re autistic! I’ll change them as long as they need!”
The fury it sent through me while I was there was insane. I’m not a parent but while I was living there, I got them connected with my behavioural therapist friend and did so many speech exercises with them. I remember specifically knowing they loved to be picked up. Every time I picked them up, I said “up” and worked all their phrases from there. It was one of the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Especially when their parents come home and my mother would just undo a lot of my progress because they would just do things for them instead of letting them do it themselves. Toilet training these kids was no picnic either … I had to hold one of them down onto the portable toilet thing when he was constipated to half understand the concept. Did I do anything the best way? Most certainly not. However, these two kids can talk now and they were toilet trained after a few months.
I’ve never felt so drained and so angry at my brother and his wife for being so absolutely inept.




Honestly, thanks. I never heard my brother say that although I know he is appreciative … but like, I’ve never heard it. So thank you.