How uncharacteristic of that totally-not-a-terrorist-state. The rest of the world is aggressively encroaching on Russia’s election interference operations, they had no choice but to invade.

Why would I leave my vehicle? That’s dangerous, there are cars out there!

Poor guy didn’t understand where signs come from, he thought he was just foraging for a natural resource.

I’ve found driving to be much less stressful after painting my windows black so I won’t see all the other scary cars on the road.

Pig farms are just pork-shorteners.

Do they want to buy the Eiffel Tower a couple times too?

Guess he’ll have to rebuild the secret lair somewhere else.

Television and movie writers across the world just thought they had a great idea and they’re all wrong.

Yeah, they turned a full 360 degrees.

fish microplastic

There are thousands of South Dakotans?

I won’t blame those kids one bit when their superpowers kick in and they start telekinetically shaking our cities to dust.

A little strange for a guy who shouldn’t be allowed near schools to begin with.

Christian, Todd, and Leslie Counties. They’re listed in this PDF linked from the article.

…it has been determined that the impact to the individuals and households in Christian and Todd Counties is not of the severity and magnitude to warrant their designation under the Individual Assistance program. In addition, it has been determined that the damage to the infrastructure in Leslie County is not of the severity and magnitude to warrant its designation under the Public Assistance program.

Go with the plan that smart people came up with but tell him he can take credit. The people who believe him would have supported him anyway but everyone else will see what’s going on.

Their empty stomachs must’ve growled menacingly.

How’d you get your hands on the first draft? Hope you wore gloves and decontaminated after.

On the plus side, pepper spraying those shitheads would be a dream.

How dare you.

Russia, stop trying to do a suicide by NATO. It’s getting ridiculous.