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Cake day: July 3rd, 2023

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  • To explain the joke:

    Half of the early FF games weren’t released in the West until later on. FF1 was, but 2 and 3 were not. So when 4 released outside of Japan, publishers thought it would be weird to have the numbering go from 1 to 4, so 4 released internationally as FF2. And then 5 got skipped over as well, so when 6 released internationally, it was released as FF3. However, they wanted to standardize the numbering starting with FF7, because FF7 was a Big Deal™, so for players outside of Japan, the series numbering suddenly jumped from FF3 to FF7. And the skipped games were later released internationally, so the numbering is now consistent across regions, with the initial Western numbering now largely forgotten.


  • “I am the all-important central pillar of this company, so looking after my health needs is how I do my job. It would be bad if I joined investor calls and virtual meetings without getting 10 hours of sleep and 3 square meals per day, so of course that time is billable. And I’ll need the company to pay for my various trainers, aides, counsellors, and spiritual advisors who keep me physically and mentally healthy, otherwise we wouldn’t have a leg up on the competition.”

    “Hey, does it make our company look bad if the Apple CEO owns a larger yacht than I do? We need to fix that ASAP. How can we make more room in the budget for my compensation? Do we really need to keep all these engineers?”


  • Fuck it, here’s my hot takes:

    1. Short, but feels just the right length, I appreciate how it seems to borrow more strongly from the D&D roots the series developed from (e.g. spell slots instead of MP)

    2. First game with defined characters. Enjoyed it but the Elder Scrolls style of leveling through ability use made it feel like you have to play a certain way and I probably grinded more than I needed to by the end.

    3. It’s aight. First game with jobs. Eternal Wind is a good track.

    4. First game with an ambitious story. Thought it was good, but a bit overhyped.

    5. The best of the 2D games and I won’t hear anyone say otherwise.

    6. I liked the large cast of characters in the first half. I didn’t like having to re-get the cast of characters in the second half. Good, but also overhyped.

    7. Most ambitious transition between games, going from 2D to 3D. I know it’s the darling of the franchise, and it is undoubtably good and packed with content, but I feel it has aged the worst of all of them.

    8. I can see why it is some people’s favorite and a lot of other people’s least favorite. Unbelievably charming cast. Good ideas with the combat but could have used another pass.

    9. The first FF game I played. Amazing cast of characters and an amazing story. Tetra Master is bullshit. Debatably not a JRPG by some definitions.

    10. Love the game to death, yet hate Tidus so much. I couldn’t get into Blitzball.

    11. Does the current Alliance Raid series in 14 count?

    12. The Gambit System ruined the rest of the franchise for a lot of people (interpret that however you like).

    13. Better than people give it credit for. Not without flaws but a lot of the hate feels more like folks never got out of the tutorial. Also, the tutorial is two thirds of the entire game.

    14. Best story of the entire FF series, but also the one that you’ll need to work the hardest to get through. Also, did you know that thereisafreetrialuptolevel70withnorestrictionsonplaytimeincludingtheawardwinningHeavenswardandStormbloodexpansions?

    15. A fun game with a good story and cast of characters, but the missing chunks of the game that it was supposed to be are apparent.

    16. Didn’t like it as much as I thought I would but still found it to be overall enjoyable. Heaviest story an FF game has ever told (including Tactics). Wish there was more of a “party” but Clive and Ben Starr’s voice work are too good not to love.

    Bonus 7R hot takes:

    • Remake: Somehow they turned a 4-hour chunk of the original game into an enjoyable 40-hour story without it feeling too drawn out. Great gameplay. Plot changes actually helped me appreciate the sequel more. Anyone worried about the game being a money grab sold in 3 parts doesn’t know what they’re missing.

    • Rebirth: Despite people’s apprehensions about plot changes, it manages to continue being incredibly faithful to the original story, with some tasteful additions. Probably the most uncompromising AAA game I’ve ever played. Can’t help but love it, and am really interested to see where part 3 goes.



  • Agreed.

    I was actually very cold to the idea of the gambit system early on because “the game plays itself” sounded like such a cheap style of gameplay.

    Later, though, when I got a better sense of what it was trying to accomplish, it made a lot more sense, especially when thinking about the game in the context of sharing the same world as Final Fantasy Tactics.

    Tactics is all about troop strategy, simulating that experience of being a military commander. The gambit system in 12, meanwhile, is like taking that concept and moving it down to the ground level, where you have to strategize with your allies before an engagement and then trust that people know what to do in the moment, with the player intervention happening one character at a time being more like real-time improvisation than strategizing.


  • I’ve played and beat every single numbered FF title except for 11.

    The new ones are good, just different. No one likes every single FF game, everyone has a favorite they associate with the time they jumped into the series, and then all others end up colored by how similar or different they seem to that ideal one.

    Even the people in this thread bashing FF13 would probably be surprised to know how many people out there think it’s the best (I know, a shock).

    I can share my own opinions on which games are good or bad, but it’s ultimately meaningless unless your tastes happen to coincide identically to my own.

    And besides, everybody knows 9 is the best, without question.





  • Agreed. Once upon a time, having water or electricity lines running to a house was considered a luxury, but eventually it became a requirement.

    The Trump-appointed Supreme Court decided that the FCC no longer has the authority to classify something like internet as a utility if it isn’t legislated as one, but steps like this are an important way to get that process started and achieve the desired result in spite of that.

    There are a lot of municipalities in the area where I live where the city-owned gas/electric departments also provide internet, and I only see that becoming more common over time given how successful their model has been. Internet access is simply a requirement to survive in developed economies these days.