Not a doctor, but I live in the southeastern US, and I’ve said that I have personal, regional, national, and global reasons for wanting to move north.

Aw, I remember hearing about these years ago and thinking that investing in a cask of booze sounded so much cooler and more real than investing hallucinatory financial instruments or whatever.

“the Second Amendment extends, prima facie, to all instruments that constitute bearable arms, even those that were not in existence at the time of the founding,”

That’s why I’m allowed to always carry a vial of the rage virus from 28 Days Later, in case I get mugged and need to end civilization.

That doesn’t sound fair to Greenland if/when Trump loses.

According to Harvard Business School, in 1937 J. D. Rockefeller’s net worth amounted to 1.5% of GDP. In today’s wealth, that would amount to about $415.8 billion. And to be honest, I have more faith that the Rockefeller number represents an accurate representation of the real, if not necessarily liquid, wealth that he commanded, whereas rather more of the modern-day billionaires’ wealth is smoke and mirrors based on their own bullshit evaluations of what their assets are theoretically worth.

It’s still a contest between which dragon is lying on top of a bigger hoard of ill-gotten gold, but those gilded age fucks were really historically impressive.

You’ve got to check your card.

Normally the metaphor isn’t this literal.

/nottheonion

The flak canon was a ton of fun, but I have a special fondness for the slime gun. Primary fire leaving a bunch of slime balls around was hilarious, as was running around with the secondary charged up, just hoping to run face first into someone and fire it at point-blank range, killing you both. Strategic or tactically sound? No. But hilarious.

Let’s all take a look at how well it worked out when America provided support for the Mujahideen in their war against Russia, but then withdrew that support when it was no longer convenient for us.

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any other invention with the possible exceptions of handguns and Tequila.

—Mitch Ratcliffe

Named official envoy to… Romania, so that he can go back and pick right up where he left off, except now he’ll have diplomatic immunity.

“Our jobs are hard! We deserve the occasional murder, as a treat!”

Olivia, my eldest daughter, caught measles when she was seven years old. As the illness took its usual course I can remember reading to her often in bed and not feeling particularly alarmed about it. Then one morning, when she was well on the road to recovery, I was sitting on her bed showing her how to fashion little animals out of coloured pipe-cleaners, and when it came to her turn to make one herself, I noticed that her fingers and her mind were not working together and she couldn’t do anything.

“Are you feeling all right?” I asked her.

“I feel all sleepy,” she said.

In an hour, she was unconscious. In twelve hours she was dead.

Roald Dahl, pleading with people to vaccinate their children against measles.

“I don’t know what’s scarier, that it’s happened, or that it happens often enough that there’s a word for it.”

America First, by Dr Seuss (1941)

There’s a quote from a Heinlein book where he talks about how Communists can only exist in places where there are real, not imagined, ills that are not being addressed, and I feel like something similar applies for Trumpists. Their lives have gone wrong somehow, likely driven by forces beyond their control, and they’ve been promised easy answers by a vile con game. I don’t appreciate that they got hoodwinked, but I can understand how it happened.

He literally can’t.

https://i.imgur.com/ZfXN74B.jpeg

“______ Resigns Under Pressure From Trump”

Fuck you, make him work for it! Make him fire you, then sue for wrongful termination! Don’t just politely get out of the way so you can be replaced by some goon who will happily do the horrible thing you’re resigning in protest of!