Seriously. The ECU in my partner’s truck decided that it was done with magic smoke and Marie Kondo’d that shit out, leaving her stranded. Her truck is an old 2002 Dodge Dakota that we’ve been nursing along while the used car market cools down (we want to get her something small and fuel efficient, but cars cost too damn much). Back in 2000 or 2001, some bean counter at Dodge decided that the company really had to cheap the fuck out with their ECUs for the 2002 model year. Because of this, any 2002 Dodge truck has either had its ECU replaced or is a ticking fucking time bomb.

What’s even better is that nobody makes these shit-ass ECUs anymore. The only replacements you can get are remanufactured units, and it’s highly likely that you’ll get at least one dud before you can find anything decent. We’ve been a tiiiiiiny bit less lucky than that, meaning we’re on our 13th ECU. Our mechanic has gone through everything else to make sure there’s not something external that’s exploding the ECUs, and he hasn’t found anything. Over the course of like 9 weeks, we’ve completely deleted the stock of these stupid things in Utah and all of the surrounding states. We’re now ordering one from Florida that’s been remanufactured by a different company which hopefully won’t grenade itself.

Fuck American car companies, and apologies to anyone who’s currently having a hard time sourcing an ECU for a 2002 Dodge Dakota. We screened all the bad ones out for you. The only good part about all of this for us is that our mechanic isn’t charging us for anything more than one ECU replacement. The damn truck has been in the shop for 9 weeks, and we’re only going to pay like $1000.